October 07 2019 0Comment

Coping with Funeral Stress

At funeral Homes in Mount Vernon, WA, families who are planning funerals for loved ones are under a lot of stress. First, there’s the stress of loss, grief, and saying goodbye to someone we love. Then there is the stress of planning the funeral for our loved one. More stress is added as we, often, slog through the funeral visitation or viewing, the funeral service, and the graveside service. Finally, more stress is piled on as we go home after the funeral to grieve and adjust to life that’s been forever altered by death.

All this stress takes a tremendous toll on us physically, mentally, and emotionally. It can lead to interrupted sleep or insomnia, overeating or undereating, irritability, panic or anxiety attacks, and lowered immunity to fight off both minor and major illnesses.

Unchecked, overwhelming stress can have long-term and serious effects on our physical health, including persistent elevated blood pressure (which could increase our risks of having strokes) and cardiovascular damage (which could increase our chances of having serious cardiac events, such as atrial fibrillation and heart attacks).

After someone we love dies, there is a rush of activity because many things have to be done – even after the funeral – to wrap up the life of someone who has died. It can often seem like everything had to be done yesterday, which can have the effect of increasing the pressure on us to get more done faster.

It’s important, though, from a stress perspective, to slow down and give ourselves some breathing room. When we’re planning funerals, one of the jobs of the funeral director is to help alleviate some of the pressure by guiding us through the process and by taking care of most of the details, so we don’t have to worry about them.

Even if our deceased loved ones didn’t specify their wishes for their funerals, we should know them well enough to be able to give them a funeral that will honor and respect them. Not having a preplanned funeral, where instructions are given for exactly what the deceased wants and doesn’t want for their funeral, is one of the biggest stressors within families as they are planning the funeral.

To counteract this stressor, our family members should come together before anyone goes to the funeral home and agree that everyone has input, but one person (preferably the executor of the deceased’s estate) makes the final decision about funeral plans. It’s important to say that agreeing to disagree with something doesn’t change the love we share as family members.

It’s also important, to help cope with funeral stress, that our families agree to take timeouts if things get too heated. Taking short breaks and leaving the room (preferably to go outside alone and get a little exercise and quiet time to calm down) is a great way to relieve intense situations that are very likely to develop as our families plan funerals.

After the funeral, the executor can alleviate some of the stress of handling the estate by dividing non-legal tasks among immediate family members to take care of, so that one person isn’t doing all the work by themselves. For example, we can assign one family member to take care of handling all our deceased loved one’s digital accounts that are not financial accounts (the executor should take care of these).

For additional information about easing funeral stress at funeral homes, our compassionate and experienced team at Moles Farewell Tributes & Crematory – Bayview Chapel is here to help. We also serve the areas of Bellingham, Ferndale and Mount Vernon, WA. You can visit our funeral home at 2465 Lakeway Dr., Bellingham, WA 98229 or you can call us today at (360) 733-0510.